Parenting is not easy. You have to decide to apply the one that suitable with your condition. Most of you may continue the parenting style that is done by your parent. Some other may listen to the advice from relatives or friend. Of course there is no single parenting ways that absolutely correct to apply. Basically, there are 4 basic parenting style that affected by the expectation and support. Based on those two aspects, there are authoritarian, cool, permissive and democratic.
So which parenting style that you applied? Get the detail of each style as follow:
Parent that apply this type of parenting style usually has high expectation level but low support. This type of parent usually tries to control and push children to do the things as they want. Strict discipline usually applied without love and affection expression. Parent with this type of parenting style usually criticize children if they do not obey. Pushing children to do as their wish is commonly happen. It makes children feels that there is no other option for them except do exactly as their parent want.
Another sign of authoritarian parenting style is never give any explanation of their order to children. Even when children questioning, they will commonly said no need to ask or directly treat children with punishment. Unluckily, this type of parenting style usually focused on the children mistake not on their positive attitude. Children get used to be criticize, punish, yelled and many other negative behavior. Children for authoritarian parenting style usually cannot think independently since they always push to do something without consider about cause and effect.
Permissive parenting style
Parent that apply permissive parenting style usually provide high support but low expectation toward children. They commonly give the full control in children hand. Fewer rules or almost no rules that set at home. Even though they have rules but it seems applied in inconsistency. It is simply because they do not like to be tied with routine. That is why they let children to be free. Parents with this type of parenting style do not like to create limit, discipline or even demand for children behavior.
This type of parent usually accept their children as who they are and even keep nice with naughty children. The negative effect on this type of parenting style is providing as many as possible choices even when children cannot make the responsible decision. Parent will just accept negative behavior without any comment whether it is wrong or right. They think that say nothing is a way out because they cannot change their children behavior or do not want to involve or avoid any debate. This parenting style is commonly chosen by working parent that want to give more fun without any supporting things.
Automatically, the permissiveness of parenting style will create manipulative children, no discipline and lack of self confidence. Seems like not enough, these types of parenting style will also result an aggressive, less responsible, ego and other negative behavior. It is simply because parents never set clear rules. Parent choose to provide freedom and let children do what they want instead of giving proper guidance of every single thing of action that done by their children.
This type of parenting style usually provides minimum support and low expectation to children. Parent commonly deny children feeling. They just want to quickly eliminate their children negative emotion. Usually, this kind of parent will distract the children to stop their emotion. They do not want to try to make solution to children problem and have a faith that the problem will come and go automatically. This parenting style makes parent worried more about how to end the emotion rather than understanding the emotion itself. They just think that problem can be easily forgotten.
The negative effect of cool parenting style will resulting children that have feeling as unimportant person, get wrong and other less confidence. Children will believe that their failure is already wrong without anything to do about it. They also get difficulties to manage their emotion. Children that get used with this parenting style will learn to deny their feeling, cannot recognize their emotion and how to solve it.
Democratic parenting style will give full of support and high expectation to children. High expectation will be get along with high support to guide children achieve their goal. Parent will always help their children to be responsible and think about each consequences of what they do. Parents with this parenting style will explain their expectation clearly based on children age. They also provide certain time to briefly explain their demand and reason. Not only expect but also always supervise to make sure children follow the rules.
Parent with democratic parenting style do the entire thing without any harm but full of love and affection. Catch children positive attitude and support them to do good behavior and not focusing on negative behavior. Parent will always provide choices to children to train children become responsible individual. This parenting style will train children to take responsibility properly based on their age like take a bath by themselves up to help the house hold job. Parent with this parenting style is train children with guidance and not punishment. Democratic is strict, discipline and consistent with the rules.
So, which parenting style that you have applies? Are you strictly choosing one of parenting style or just in the middle of these 4? The study showing positive result will be appearing on democratic parenting style. Permissive style will make children become aggressive while authoritarian will make children becomes obey and low self esteem. Cool parenting style will resulting low achievement and lack self confidence. Choose the best parenting style that fit for you. The key is support and give proper guidance for kid. Remember that parenting style is the basic of children development.